I know what you’re thinking, “Wu Tang title for a Johnny Cash portrait tattoo? Really Julene?” Yes, really. Wu-Tang and Johnny Cash are totally the same level of amazing, decades and genre differences aside.


Each time I see an old timey portrait tattoo, I hope there’s a photo hanging on a wall somewhere with the exact same face & color composition. Surely I’m not the only one?

…because King Diamond does it better.

If you’re going to get a tattoo that in any way relates to weed, you must make it at least this awesome. But there’s more than just weed to be seen in this amazing leg sleeve!

An amazing depiction of the “Rose of No Man’s Land” Getting jealous!!

A grandfather pic on the sleeve certainly makes for a great portrait tattoo. Grandpa love to die to for…

Another amazing creation of grandpa Fred on the sleeve…

Another portrait that makes me have one for myself!

Who says turtles can’t fly? They can fly though they can’t tie their shoe laces!

Anyone thirsty? With this one, you can’t get enough of Pepsi! Can you?

Got milk? What about some extra cheese perhaps! This is a large cow flying through the lovely sky.

You can never run out of light!

Who says you are on a desert? A smiling cactus on the blue sky, to remind you of the sunny day!

Ever seen the movie UP? Where is Russel going now?Is he headed towards another great adventure?

If you are eating your hotdog, this is the thing you want. Anybody who wants ketchup? What about make it extra size!

Who says early birds are the only ones getting the worm? With this big bird its going to be more than a worm for lunch!

Now Happy Halloween Kids! What about some trick or treat?

And who says that your hot air balloon should not have inner peace? Now let us try some Kung fu Panda Up in the air!

Dear Mr. Scammer

I owe you a few apologies:

• I am sorry for responding and saying sure I am happy to engage in a bizarre business deal with you knowing full well it isn’t real.

• I am sorry you wasted time to print a horrible fake check.

• I am sorry you spent $4.90 UPS’ing it to me overnight.

• I am sorry for taking a few days to get back to you after I got the check and ask you for your phone number which you can’t give me. I knew that and still I emailed you for the phone number.

• I am sorry that I lied to you and said I could not find a western union office near me, making you look them up, emailing me a list and me telling you those two liquor stores are shut down.

• I am sorry that I lied to you about getting pissed at the western union office because they wanted $1.75 to cut a check and that I said that’s robbery and left in a huff. The truth is I never went there in the first place. Sorry for wasting your time that day.

• I’m sorry I lied the next day after you threaten to call the FBI and local police on me because I cashed your check and would not pay you. I knew you would not, but I wrote you an email begging you not to call the police and that I would pay you tomorrow after I cashed the check.

• I’m sorry that I lied the next day and said the western union office girl was rude to me so I left in anger, again delaying your money by another day.

• Im sorry I lied about sending the money to western union in your name vs the shipper so you could not pick it up. I realize this cost you a day or so.

• I am really sorry that I lied and said that the money order was at your western union, but off by 1 zip code making you drive 30 minutes to find out I am a liar.

• Your last email to me was justified. Obviously from your language you were pissed. The fact that as you “YELLED” and your grasp of the English language seemed to fade away like my Mom’s when she is livid showed me what a bad person I am.

• Your phone call from Africa? was upsetting because as you were trying to explain to me how to go down to western union and pay the $1.75 and you would pick up the fee, I realized how frustrated you were getting. I also lied about being hard of hearing and asking you to yell. Sorry.

All in all, I am sorry for sucking up your bandwidth. I realize that my actions probably sucked up 6-10 hours of your time and kept you from fleecing some gullible person in America.
Please forgive me. Go ahead and send me another forged check and I will send you my cash to your shipper. Please try me again. Even though I lied you to about 15 times I won’t do it again.
Your friendly computer person.

Here’s the direct link

Dear Mom: It is with great regret and sorrow that I’m writing you. I had to elope with my new boyfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with Dad and you. I’ve been finding real passion with Ahmed and he is so nice-even with all his piercings, tattoos, beard, and his motorcycle clothes. But it’s not only the passion Mom, I’m pregnant and Ahmed said that we will be very happy. He already owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. He wants to have many more children with me and that’s now one of my dreams too. Ahmed taught me that marijuana doesn’t really hurt anyone and we’ll be growing it for us and trading it with his friends for all the cocaine and ecstasy we want. In the meantime, we’ll pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so Ahmed can get better; he sure deserves it!! Don’t worry Mom, I’m 15 years old now and I know how to take care of myself. Someday I’m sure we’ll be back to visit so you can get to know your grand children.

Your daughter, Judith

PS: Mom, none of the above is true. I’m over at the neighbor’s house. I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than my report card that’s in my desk center drawer. I love you! Call when it is safe for me to come home.

See more here…

(via holytaco)